When is Poop no longer Poop?

I was washing mushrooms for making cream of mushroom soup, when it occurred to me that many mushrooms grow in rotting carcases, dying tree trunks, and poop. I made sure to wash more carefully while pondering aloud if my mushrooms were indeed grown in poop.

To this my roommate reminded me that most industries would use fertilized wood shavings, or just straight up fertilizer. To which I then remarked that a lot of fertilizers were in fact, cow manure- poop.

But of course, roommate states that after a lot of time, we don't really consider manure poop any more- because it's more like soil. But I'm sure I know many people who think that manure is indeed poop. But then, in nature, a lot of soil used to be poop, and certainly are not poop now.

So if I take a piece of poop, and leave it to the forces of nature for however long- will it one day no longer be considered poop? If it's still there in a block I'd still look at it and call it poop.

Is it the odour of poop that gives it the poopiness? Odours are actually remnants of the stomach bacterial action, creating disgusting sulphur-containing compounds, famous example being hydrogen sulphide. Of course, over time, these compounds are broken down by non-gut-out-of-body-in-nature bacteria or dissolved into the surrounding environment. At some point, the stench will be gone, take for example, dried poop- it has no stink! But alas, I still think it is poop.

So perhaps poop should be better defined by having come out of the intestinal tract of some animal? And since single cellular organisms don't have intestines, we can certainly say that alcohol is not yeast poop!

But then, if we really think about it, SOIL HAS A LOT OF POOP. After all,  a good deal of it it either came from an animal taking a squat or from a dead plant that was eaten by a worm or insect and released after passing through a smaller, but equally real, intestinal tract. But is soil really made of poop? I can't be the only one who finds this thought disturbing. There are young curious children who eat dirt after all.

Human beings can be pretty interesting about this, our own disgust at poop seems to be a species subjective trait. Many animals, like most pet hamsters, are perfectly ok eating their own poop. Worms eat other animals' poop. Hell, plants get so many nutrients from all sorts of poop.

So perhaps soil really a bunch of poop and other things and we're all just too squeamish to acknowledge this.

ASDFJKL;

Years ago, in a moment of anger before having to start studying for a test, I typed these letters into the Google. The first search result made me smile.

Years later, in yet another moment of anger before having to start studying for my finals, I again typed these letters into Google. I was reminded again of why there are just some great and unique people in the world.

If you haven't searched "asdfjkl;" on Google yet, this is the site I keep referring to: http://www.asdfjklsemicolon.com

I think it's cute. I considered writing little updates on my life every week to whoever would receive these messages. But considering I'm not so great at doing that on my own blog, you wouldn't be surprised to learn I didn't follow through with that plan.

But I always marvel that there exists people who try to extend out of the norm, and manage to do so in such an encouraging and simple manner. I find it adorable that there exists this website where I can type away to a real human person and know that it will be read but never replied to.

It's that same feeling of throwing a message in a bottle out into the waters at a beach, or carving an inspirational quote on a park bench, or even scribbling out your thoughts with permanent marker in washroom stalls.

This is all, of course, if you ignore the cruder messages regarding human genitalia and depressing world issues that people send out under cover of anonymity.

Inspiration

I recently had an extremely inspiring English lecture for my science fiction course. In short, we marveled over the ability of science to be the language by which we see the wonder of our universe. I was quite moved because it was exactly what I always feel when I talk about some cutting edge science. Sometimes I am viewed as slightly ecstatic in my constant emotional swings about how great the world is, but I really do wish to share this feeling of awe that I have about life, the universe and everything.

It really dawned upon me when we first learned about chemical reactions that we know so much about how atoms and molecules work, but at the end of the day, the atoms and molecules don't think for themselves no matter how we try to personify them. We can calculate the equilibrium points and rates of reactions for various solutions, but when you get some lead nitrate and potassium idodide in solution, they just REACT. Things just happen, sporadically, by chance, but on the macroscopic level we see not such randomness  but the overall trend. To even think about two atoms and the unlimited amount of environmental influences on them to react inside a solution... well we may never be able to fully consider EVERYTHING.

Perhaps size is the ultimate reason for the sublime nature of science, probably why I still sometimes spend hours starting at this: http://scaleofuniverse.com/

Why I love the world:

• We will never be able to full understand all of it
• No matter how big we go, there's always something bigger
• No matter how small we go, that had to also have been made up of something
• We don't know if the past ends or the future ends or if there's something completely different
• The thrill that already we know so much of it
• We've mapped out the majority of our world now pretty well
• WE MADE COMPUTERS
• It might all just be due to chance! Our entire existence might be due to chance!
• Most people find this thought disturbing, but I think that it just makes life that much more unique
• I mean consider the odds that allowed for you to be here right now
• And the fact that you beat the odds! 
• Statistically speaking life is a rarity

In the end, I marvel at the eons that caused everything amazing that exists today. Perhaps because it serves as a reminder that I'm insignificant in the broader world, but at the same time, the world would not exist without the masses of fellow insignificant dots like myself. 

Farewell Sincerely

I've been coming up with new ways of ending letters recently. It started because I have several friends overseas for the summer, of whom I keep in contact with via emails. I'm actually going to start writing out letters and snail-mailing them over soon.

In any case, I never really liked ending my letters with 'Sincerely,'... mostly because it was used in the past to denote that it was truly from whoever it said it was from... but really anyone can lie about that. Luckily, today we use something a bit more casual when ending letters between friends. Usually, "Cheers," and "Best wishes", etc. Cheers is always nice, but I'm not always holding onto a cheery drink whenever I read my letters.

For a time I started using "Shine on!" and other motivating statements. But sometimes it's awkward to end a casual "this is how my week went" letter with something like that.

So I thought, what would be the best way to end off a letter with a cheerful and optimistic tone? And my conclusion, was food.

See, the thought of good food always makes me smile. And depending on the tone of my letter, an ending like, "Cheesecake and butterscotch" can either mean, "sugar and sweets and joy!" or "Help me I need comfort food." Also, depending on the type of food chosen, you can end off with a tea time feel (cookies, biscuits, etc) or a fancy flair feel (Lobster, Wines, etc) or a casual friendly feed (pizza, sushi, etc).

It also helps me search my brain for interesting things I'd like to make, and somehow ends up inspiring me; not necessarily to make food . It's more like, "I should make cheesecake sometime... but I don't have the ingredients... but I want make something sweet and cute... maybe I should get productive and do that... being productive always feels nice... maybe I should finish that application I should be doing. Ya, that doesn't require buying of ingredients but it'll make me feel productive, let's do it!"

And I realize not everyone's thought process works in that manner, but whenever I feel like doing something that requires a lot of work (like going to the store and buying ingredients, I need to find a less physically extraneous placeholder. So as long as I feel like being productive, I will produce, and being lazily inspired usually ends up making me produce things on the computer.

In actuality, I'm writing this blog after sending off an email.

Vanilla and Macarons,
Sprouts

Why do I Blog

I blog because sometimes, I have things to say. Things that I don't want to say in person, just because I never remember to or it never fits any conversation quite right.

Of course most of what I blog came up from conversations, so really I blog because I want to share interesting things I've said and been told. And when what I want to share goes beyond the regular limit of a facebook status, or perhaps I just want to share it with the internet in general, that's when a blog is needed. And to share that with friends would require much less time since I wouldn't have to rewrite everything for everyone I wanted to tell the same story to. Copy and pasting links take far less time.

Sometimes just writing to relive the story or to expand on a thought is fun. It's like writing in a diary, but not a private one. It's this strange pseudo-privacy that only the internet can give.

And sometimes when I'm feeling bored or down or have nothing really better to do, it's nice to just sit down and write whatever comes to mind. It's more for me, but if it were only for me then it'd stay in my head. Things always become more real when it's no longer just in your head.

Stubborn

Thinking about things, I really realized how much I always want things to go my way. My ego constantly blinds me and give me the crystalline illusion that my way is best.

Obviously that's not the case for most the time. But I'm so darned stubborn that somehow things always go my way. Which, at the time, is wonderful; looking back, is not so much so.

I'm not sure if I'd categorize this as 'regret', things can always be worse, but there's still this occasional nagging feeling that things also could have been better.

And times like this it's hard to just close my mind off and just let go. Being content is enough, but only sometimes. Yeah, I'm selfish like that.

It's a nasty habit, and I think I should change it, but I seem to so far only realize it when looking back, and not at the present time. But there's also the thought that always trying to have things my way is how I choose to express myself; I just really enjoy expressing myself (even when it makes no sense). And sometimes stepping down for a moment actually causes me so much mental anguish that it'd probably be better for everyone around me if I didn't. Am I defending myself now? Maybe.

In the end I think it comes down to confidence, and in some areas I have too much (not all of which is well earned). But though I keep thinking about this, I know that nothing about me is going to change, because I really don't want to change anything. It's just slightly unfortunate, but not yet worth the trouble.

Respect to the creator of beautiful things

I like pretty things.

It's always nice to be walking merrily along and suddenly be struck by inspiration. People are such wonderful creatures with brilliant thoughts and imaginations. We're awesome. 

I really like admiring other people's creations, especially when they make me feel. Sometimes I'm a bit disappointed that I can't exactly explain my feelings or even describe them adequately, mostly this happens when I'm talking to someone else. But most of the time I'm content to just let the emotions wash over me without the care to focus on them too much. 

I guess that's another reason I really respect artists, they can express themselves and be understood. Somehow they can turn the abstract idea that only they can see into something that can be shared. I respect that, a lot. 

It's only through understanding each other that we an get along in the end, and it's very hard to be understood when you can't explain yourself. 

Nature's pretty things

... I downloaded Picasa last night...

I then proceeded to look through past somewhat pretty photos I took and fixed them up... I now understand why so many of my friends are into photography. A good picture is good. It's this easy way to be artistic without the hassle of learning how to paint.

But in my sincerest belief, anyone can be a good photographer, but to be a truly brilliant one involves that much more work. That's not to say that the good photographers should just stop; any good photo is a delight to experience.

I know a lot of good photographers. They constantly delight me with their work, I've saved quite a few of their photos too. Hang on, let me get some copy right permission to post some.

Permission-getting successful.

From the world of my good friend Duckii

This was taken at a park in the fall season. I love the sparkling water and the exact moment of this capture. It's amazing because you feel like the goose knew to pose. The overall colours are also wonderful, it's a smooth blend of the orange-warm tones. 

I'm just wondering when she got the time to get a perfect drop of water on a leaf for this shot. It's clean and has a calming effect. Also kind of makes me thirsty, even though I know how small that drop would be in real life. This reminds me of something my past PI said about how she enjoyed photography because it allows you to look at things from a new angle and see something completely different. 

Over last summer, while communicating via email, Picadasiy clued me in on her own photography skills. 

Loving the deep blue tones here. It's a calming picture... I'm thinking in my head "the secret life of plants" for some reason. I generally love it when a photo's hues blend in well; the use of all warm colours or all cool colours. Not sure why, but bright radiating colours need to be done really well in order for it to resonate with me.

But then, the mix of green and pink has always been a big favourite of mine when it does come to colour. It's my symbol of feminism. I think my favourite dress was pink and green. Not sure what happened to it now... I need more pink and green dresses... I also really love flowers (as you can predict...), in fact this picture is basically everything I consider myself in a nutshell. 

So as I may or may not have alluded to, I've been messing with past photos these days... While I like them, I've got this terrible thing about sharing art. Art to me is a way of expressing myself so much more intimately than words ever can. Words easily mask the truth, but art is really the "language of the soul" to use a cliche. 

I just spent the past few days puzzling over whether I should open myself up to the world or not. I suppose I shouldn't make such a big deal of these things really... but I can't help how strongly I feel about it. Perhaps I'll just sneak a photo or two of my own into future blogs. 

Anonymous

I just started around 5 different posts today... publishing none but this. Why? Because I'm scared.

The internet used to be my way of expressing myself anonymously, but to a point I did want to share some ideas with people I knew... but people who know me will no doubt judge me based on what I write.

Sometimes I like to be judge; I play out situations to be judged. Other times I really want to just do away with the mask of my life and be truthful. But the truth always carries such power; and often times it's deadly. And there's a lot of opinions that I have that I'd want to share but I'm always scared it'll offend.

I fell back on this previous alias with hopes to stay a secret, but I'm not so good at keeping my own secrets.

At this point comes another time when I just have to trust myself. And just remember that there are countless other people who don't know me. It's a comforting thought.

What's an internet?

Aka. Internet, World Wide Web... Cue xkcd reference:

What the hell is it?

Strange question I know, since you're USING the interwebs right now... as am I. And we're all quite aware of what it is and how it came about. Some of us even understand the internal  workings of the internet. The thing is, when my brother asked me, "What's an internet?" (after my repeated explainations of why we cannot yet download more games on his iTouch), I found I had a really hard time explaining what the internet IS. Stumbling for words, my inadaquet answer for him was, "It's this public space where you can get stuff... electronically... and... ya..."

Sure, I could have gone into the whole oxford definition:

Pronunciation:/ˈɪntənɛt/

noun

(the Internet)

• a global computer network providing a variety of information and communication facilities, consisting of interconnected networks using standardized communication protocols.

But I doubt my brother's six-year old mind would have understood. So here's what the internet means for me:

• A way to instantly connect with people
• Instantly get information from anywhere in the world
• Entertainment 
• Global community
• Place to share ideas
• and information
• and files (Stop SOPA and PIPA)
• A place where ordinary social cues change 
• Be yourself, or be anyone else
• Where all my research gets done
• Mutli-task extreme!

Thinking about it now, Jeffrey Deaver wrote a lovely short essay in his book The Blue Nowhere about the internet:

"The line between the real world and the machine world is becoming more and more blurred each day. But it's not that humans are turning into automatons or becoming slaves to machines. No, we're simply growing towards each other. In the Blue Nowhere, machines are taking on our personalities and culture- our language, myths, metaphors, philosophy and spirit. ... Now he turns on his computer and enters the Blue Nowhere, a place where he interacts- he has tactile stimulation of the keyboard, verbal exchanges, he's challenged. He can't be passive anymore. He has to provide input to get some response. He's entered a higher level of existence and the reason is that machines have come to him. They speak his language. ..."

It's interesting to think that the internet really is whatever we choose to make of it and it turns into what we, as a whole, create.

Naming Inanimate Objects

I've been desperately trying to find a suitable name for my new smartphone... it's quite difficult. Usually in the process of using a new piece of technology I somehow manage to find a name for it.

My very first cell phone's name was Flipper... it was a flip phone and I was uninspired. The second cell phone was named Smiles since for the longest time it's bluetooth device name was "=)". I decided that if people wanted to connect to my phone via bluetooth they had to be reminded to smile. When I got my laptop I named it Lappy completely without thinking... well I wasn't about to name it Toppy now was I? When I got the Asus Eee pad Transformer, which functions as both a tablet and a netbook really nicely, I named it Neblet, after sending a text to a friend and combining the words as to not have to write as much.

Now I'm at a loss for what to name this smartphone I have. And while I pondered it I started wondering why I name my electronics...

So for an elective this year I took a linguistic anthropology course. I remember distinctively in the book we were to read (written by the professor) a chapter about naming. It was interesting because it talked of names as a way humans tried to make a link with the "soul"... and by naming something, it was like creating life. In a way I understand this, adding a name to something personifies it for me... but not really to the point where I'd know if Neblet was male or female.

When I was small I named my stuffed animals. The ones that are now lost or given away I can not longer remember the names for, the ones that are still around I do remember the names for... generally. It seems the more attached to a plushie I am, the more likely I'd remember it's name.

My very first doggy plushie was named Tom. My favourite nanny gave me it when I was just entering "childhood". Tom was the first English name I learned and since I knew I was going to an English speaking country I decided that it would only be right that this doggy plushie had an English name.

Tom and I shared a lot of memories, and one day someone got me another doggy plushie (probably trying to win over my young heart's affection after seeing how much I loved Tom). This doggy plushie was actually a valentine gift, it was a doggy holding this heart that said something on it (beyond memory). I cut the heart off; I just wanted the doggy part of the plushie. Did this make me a heartless person?

Regardless, I named the new doggy Sarah, can't remember the reasoning now. But Tom and Sarah made for a good clique-like couple. I still have them now because I can't really bare to throw them into the cold confines of the basement.

So now I'm considering naming the phone Sandwich. Because soon (hopefully) it will run on android Ice-cream sandwich, and it is not the LG Ice-cream phone that I wanted in the past, hence it is only a Sandwich... But it really looks more like a Bar than a Sandwich. I suppose I'll have to decide later.

Idea that will not work

Studying biochemistry: Sudden idea came to mind. What if we could take all the enzymes involved in glycolysis, make it a pill, and eat that with every meal? Then the sugars will get broken down inside our stomach and we won't get insulin release and therefore it'll be like we never ate!

But then I realized problems...

• Those enzymes probably aren't designed to work in the acidic environment of the stomach
• Even if they worked there'd be no NAD+ in the stomach 
• And if we added NAD+ as part of the pill, I'm pretty sure I read an article saying that NADH can be absorbed through the intestines along with other small particles (like acetyl CoA)
• So basically cells will still have access to the energy; they just don't have to do it themselves
• Speaking of which there's probably no ATP in the stomach either, so that's something else that needs to be in the pill
• Oh, and the enzymes will get degraded by proteases found in the stomach... because you know... digestion involves the degradation of proteins...

So then I thought, if a pill doesn't work, what if we made it an injection of sorts? So instead of an insulin injection, it'll be one full of everything you need for glycolysis! This will reduce blood glucose levels immediately and so insulin will not get released from the liver!

But more issues:

• NADH in the blood... is that normal? Pretty sure it'll mess with pH levels
• Speaking of pH levels, the blood has a different pH from cell cytosols so the enzymes won't be fully active
• Also acetyl CoA can probably get transported through cells... Not 100% sure about that but it seems like something that's plausible 

So after talking with fellow science students about it the new idea that came up was an injection of a vesicle that had:

• GLUT4 transporter: more glucose outside vesicle than inside; glucose flows in
• Hexokinase: adds phosphate to glucose to trap it in vesicle while encouraging more glucose in due to concentration gradient

Then my friend told me that it didn't have to be so complicated and that we could just find something to bind to glucose in the blood and ensure it doesn't get into cells. But then the issue is how to get rid of this glucose-binded molecule since it'll likely be too big for filtration at the kidneys.

We went on brainstorming and I was quite pleased that from our simple undergraduate level of biochemistry understanding we were actually able to come up with so many ideas. It really did feel like what science was all about. Sure it may seem like we're just memorizing random useless information at times, but it's the application of all the information into potentially applicable ideas that really is the end result. 

I remember my summer research prof telling me, "No one likes doing the repetitive work, but we really have to take some time once in a while to remember why we're doing the work and to think of possibilities and come up with ideas. And you can't do that unless you do the work and get the results first."

We're all going to die

Article: http://rt.com/news/bird-flu-killer-strain-119

Summary: Scientists have created a SUPER VIRUS from the avian H5N1 flu virus that now has the ability to infect humans.

H5N1 is usually a virus found in birds. Researchers infected a few ferrets with it, since apparently ferrets have similar immune systems to humans. Result: Virus can now infect people. Did I mention this virus is predicted to be able to kill off half the human population? That's 1/2. 50%. ~3.5 billion people dead.

Scary thought? Don't worry about it!

The real problem right now isn't if there will be a man-made epidemic, you see these scientists aren't so careless as to allow this new virus outside the lab. There are many safety procedures against that.

The issue here is if these scientists should be allowed to publish their work. This is a great achievement in biology and science after all... but recall current beliefs that the next world war will be fought with biological weapons. And these scientists have basically created possibly the most deadly weapon of that sort... and if they publish they'll be making the methods they used public.

Public meaning anyone has access to it, other scientists, innocent undergrads and the bio-terrorists.

So obviously they shouldn't be allowed to publish right? But the methods in this study could potentially open the scientific field up to novel ideas regarding infectious diseases. If we can mutate a disease to become infectious, we can do the opposite too can't we? The more we understand infectious diseases the more of a chance we have of finding a way to temper with their mechanisms of survival, thus saving ourselves.

So while the big guys figure out the legal details, all we regular folks can do is sit pitifully and await the results. Who knows? Maybe their methods used extremely expensive equipment that only the Netherlands can afford...

Where'd all my ideas go?

Start rant:

• Feeling extremely uninspired these days
• Can't come up with new ideas
• Unmotivated
• Completely lost own opinion on life
• Life is bland
• Feels like the future's about to hit me in the face but I still can't see it very clearly

End rant.

Annoying drama aside, I actually do feel quite vague. Yes, I feel vague. There's no other word that seems to accurately describe it.

I just feel like there's nothing new in life. 

Obvious solution is to go do something new, but I have absolutely no motivation to do so. I feel like I'm just sitting around doing nothing of importance and yet perfectly fine with that. And the fact that I'm fine with it is what I'm not fine with. Did that even make sense? 

Point is, I'm uninspired and have no motivation to seek inspiration. And although it's quite clear that inspiration isn't going to go out its way to find me, I can't muster up the motivation to be the seeker. I guess I feel like everything that I want to do, I can't do. And to a point it reminds me of the Alchemist (Paulo Coelho), am I going to be one of the many people who'll never find my "personal legend"? 

So I've decided that no matter what happens, when I have a child, I'll support him/her to whatever his/her choice is... but as I made this decision I'd also rather not be blamed for not providing good guidance. It's quite annoying to try to do what you want in life when we live in a world where it seems like everything's against you rather than with you. And life just continues on without any mind to you. 

At the end of the day, it still feels like nothing you do matters while everything you don't does. I feel like society has become too rigid, making demands of us and forcing us into our assigned roles then trapping us there. I want to be able to explore the world without worries. I want to be able to make it through life piece by piece, working up to the end rather than throwing my youth away for the end result. I want to stop and smell the flowers, hell even make a basket of them along the way, but instead I find my eyes always looking down the road searching for... something spectacular. But by the time I reach it, I'm already looking on ahead for something else. 

But even though I know this, I can't listen to it. I'm not stubborn enough to believe in myself to the point where I'll allow myself to slow down. To a point I'm almost scared of believing that I can do whatever I want, simply because I'll have no excuse to not follow my heart. 

Things to do with paper stars

I was folding paper stars today out of boredom from studying. It's always a nice way to relax. At the present time I've got a nice box of stars.

LOOK! THEY SPARKLE!

Ok, so it's not that many stars, I just started ok?! Regardless, I realized it would probably be a good idea if I took the time to figure out what the heck I'm going to do with all these stars after I get a bigger buildup of them. 

Time to think.


Fill up a jar 

This works as a great gift idea, also a great decoration for the house. Sadly I've already got a jar that kinda just sits on my desk without a purpose. Also, the real jars made for holding these stars are actually rather expensive, and I'd feel terrible giving away stars in some random leftover container that happens to be see-through. But this is also the easiest go-to method to desposing of these stars. In all actuality I do make the majority of my stars with the intention of giving them away eventually, I just never find the time to get a nice jar for them. 


Use them as gift packaging
This is a new idea I've started recently. Since I have a whole bunch of stars anyways, why don't I use them to package gifts? Esspicially when giving away jewlery boxes and the like, add some stars to the box and it turns out pretty cute. At first sight the receipent thinks (s)he's been given a box of stars, but in reality the stars are just there to mask the true gift! How cute! 


String them up
I really would like to do this... but I have a feeling that it'll require precise work with a needle. Though I think it'd be pretty cool to have paper stars stringed up and tapped above my bed. Forget those childish glow-in-the-dark stick-on stars, I've got 3D dangling stars! 


Use them as weapons
Yes I do know about the paper ninja stars:

But that takes way too much time to fold, and you only get to throw it once. Whereas with puffed up paper stars, you can have a whole bunch to shoot off at people. Make one fast and chuck it away! 

Make Jewelry 

Either get the legit earring making stuff or just thread some up for a bracelet. It probably won't last very long but these stars are practically endless anyways. 

Write messages

So you might know that most star paper is blank on one side. It is therefore possible to write secret messages in it. I have done so before. Of course, no one knows because no one will bother opening every single star I attack them with. For all you know, I could have threw you a star in which I apologized for stealing that $20 from your wallet that one time you lost $20... but you'll never know. 

Action Typing and Parentheses

Ever been on some chat and expressed an action using typed words? For example:

• *sigh*
• -facepalm-
• <headdesk>
• [sob]

It's always worked simply enough in the past. In fact, I was quite fond of using the *action* asterisks to demonstrate an action via chat. However, recently I have started using google chat more than normal msn. And in google chat, using asterisks serves to bold a word and hence the asterisks are no longer seen in chat. This is a problem because when I want to sigh, I'd like to express it as *sigh* rather than sigh. 

So I resorted to using the -action- dashes. At first this seemed a wonderful idea, when used on facebook and MSN with little trouble. However, GOOGLE COMPLICATES MY LIFE. For you see, -sigh- on google turns into sigh! A brilliant move on their part since I can now easily make crossed out words jokes, however again I found it difficult to describe an action! 

Then I decided I would use some form of parentheses to signify an action. Now there were many forms of parentheses to choose from...

Square parentheses [action]:

For those who often use quotations, you'll know that the square parentheses are used to add in or change a word within a quote. So if you wanted to use a quote, "This is a quote." in a sentence and be grammatically correct with caps, you'd have to write it as "[t]his is a quote." Also if someone said something but the subject was not in the quote, you'd have to add in a [he] or [she] within the quote so it made sense. "[She] gave a quote." I would rather not cause confusion between quotes and my actions so I did not use square parentheses to signify actions.

Squiggly parentheses {action}:

I have never used these parentheses... in fact I'm not really sure what they're used for outside of showing domain and range in math class... Thing is using these parentheses to signify action just looks odd to me... I don't feel like a {sigh} really shows my sigh... in fact it looks like a thought bubble to me... as though I'm thinking about sighing but not actually sighing...

Round parentheses (action): 

Round parentheses I often use to add in other phrases within my phrases (because I often like getting side tracked when I type) or when I'm adding in some form of example of what I'm talking about (eg. Right now). Hence to use them to signify an action will only cause confusion ("is she sighing right now, or is she just stating that as another idea or example?")

Weird obtuse triangular parentheses:

I can't make these things (refer to 4th parentheses in image above)... at least without using the alt + ### so let's just forget about their existence...

Normal triangular parentheses <action>:

These parentheses are used in HTML and many codes. In normal conversation I use them to create fill-in-the-blanks. Sometimes if I don't want to mention names or other things I'll say that <insert name here> did <insert action here>. Now I suppose I can take this already set in place rule to sigh by <insert sigh>... but... it's not the same... 

So for now I'm going to use {action} for a while to see if this strange thought bubble shaped parentheses is capable of fully expressing my actions. If I decide it's not up to the task, well... I could always resort to the underscore _action_ unless that causes my text to be underlined on google chat... Oh actually it causes italics! Great... just great...

"It works"

My brother likes crying. As 5-year-olds sometimes do. My parents can't stand it.

The other day my mom asked my brother why he cried when he was having a play-date over. His reply, "I wanted my friend to stop, but she wouldn't stop! If I cry then you come over and make her stop! It works!"

It's true. It worked. And it still works. Every. Single. Time.

Basic human psychology here I guess, toddler kid cries--> parents are alerted that there is *something* that's causing their wonderly-adorable-innocent child discomfort. Parents dislike the thought that their child is experiencing mild displeasure. Parents MUST intervene.

Which is all great and wonderful for the most part, parental love and all that, but when the child is especially brilliant (as my brother is <insert ego here>) they start abusing this basic protection right.

Fact is, my brother knows perfectly well that if he cries, he'll get attention. So he cries. And he gets attention. This basic form of "lying" is actually pretty smart if you think about it. Whereas some children and nice a quiet and doesn't ask for things, my brother will go out of his way to manipulate the minds of our parents in order to get what he wants.

Case 1: Brother tells mother his stomach hurts and asks to come home from daycare. Mother says no. He then proceeds to tell her that not only does his stomach hurt, his fingers, feet and head hurt as well!

Case 2: Brother not good at soccer in his soccer camp. The best soccer player gets a lot of attention (which brother obviously wants). Brother starts yelling crude comments and doing weird dances during games causing his friends to laugh and the teacher to talk to him.

Case 3: Brother doesn't want to eat dinner. He complains of stomach aches. Parents remain firm on the fact that he needs to eat. Brother then needs to go to the washroom. 5 times. Repeatedly. Oh, and he was tired and wants to sleep as well.

Now ego aside, I'm sure most kids do this. Because they want the attention. So it becomes the parent's job to not spoil their child too much, or else their future becomes:

Still, you got to give the kids some respect for going through the struggles of attempting to psychologically manipulate their parents. It's almost... sinister.

Google+

After using google + for a while. I have come to a valid conclusion of how to describe it to people.

Imagine Facebook and Twitter had a baby. Then Google kidnapped it and made Youtube teach it some lessons. Skype was the surrogate mother.

And that's Google+

Thing was, Skype never wanted to have Google+, but was forced into carrying the child unwillingly. Realizing the potential dangers that Google will become with the plus sign made Skype finally submit to Microsoft.

Hearing of this, Facebook, who was still pissed at Google for stealing the child, decides to team up with Microsoft... sort of. Rather, Facebook decides to let Skype help out around the home, so really it's not like Microsoft and Facebook "teamed up" against Google, more like Facebook thought Skype was cool and wanted to hang out more.

All things aside though, here's a list of things I want Google to add to Google+. Whether they do it or not may sadden me.

• Let me post on other people's profiles: facebook's wall idea was quite ingenious mostly for that
• Let me share my Google Calendar with people in specific circles
• Have a link to people's blogs that'll update on their profile so I don't have to use the blogger reading list to know when someone updated
• Share documents via Google docs: Good for people who want to edit each others works or stuff like that
• Allow separate news feeds for each circle since I care more about certain people's lives than others
• Allow me to share a post with all my circles EXCEPT one (instead of having to click all the circles I have except one I can just choose "Exclude <circle name here>" or something)

Otherwise I'm curious as to what other new contraptions Google will come up with for their newest interweb spawn. 

Lack of true emotional responses

Ever hear a piece of news and have a reaction to it, only to realize afterwards that your reaction was not socially proper?

Today my brother said he was being bullied in summer camp. Apparently some kid told him his face was ugly then encouraged the rest of the class to laugh at him.

My immediate reaction: HOW DARE SOME LITTLE BRAT INSULT MY BROTHER?!? I WILL HAVE A TALK WITH THIS KID'S MOTHER!

After a few split seconds I had another reaction: lol, kids these days with their idiotic insults

Then I switched back to the original reaction: LITTLE IDIOTIC BRAT DEFILES THE NAME OF HUMANKIND WITH HIS/HER LAME INSULT!

And then: Well kids are kids and they don't have the ability to come up with anything better... they'll learn

Which finally concluded to: Hey, I dealt with bullies when I was a kid, my brother'll just have to learn to do the same thing. It'll strengthen him up if he survives it.

But does this mean I will sit by calmly and allow some random kid to bully my brother? Actually yes I think I will... but at the same time I certainly don't think I would if I had not had a secondary emotional response.

Lately (some time ago) I've been reconsidering what makes a person who they are (nature/nurture). And I say it's the former (nature).

At this moment there is actually nothing I'd like better than to find the kid who told my brother his face was ugly and demand an apology for such insolence. But of course, I won't. A: it'll be pointless since screaming at little children does not look very good and B: I doubt the kid knew what (s)he was doing. So following through my multiple reactions to the news of my brother's bully I've concluded that my instinctive self is of an evil and selfish nature.

It may be cynical, but I stand by the belief that as a person, individually, all human beings are evil and selfish. The only reason we're good is because it's to our benefit to be selfless.

Consider this: You're lost and alone on an island. What do you do? You survive; killing innocent animals. If you're trying to be selfless and vegetarian, you kill innocent plants. If you choose to not kill or hurt ANYTHING, you die. Selflessness kills.

Now consider you're lost but not alone on the same island. The number of prey and resources has not increased. But in this situation it'd probably be a good idea to partner up with whoever else is with you as to increase your chances of survival. Out of selfishness for your own survival, you'd probably be willing to share food and water. If you were truly selfless you'd hunt and gather resources with the other person but eat and use nothing. This results in your death.

Now maybe the other person's a better hunter so you allow them to eat more, to increase their chances of survival since they can increase your own chances of survival. But I truly cannot think of a good reason to offer them more food otherwise. Unless you're just a nice person and would feel bad if they didn't eat more than you (in which case you're only being nice to avoid the guilt you'd feel otherwise).

I suppose in the end I feel like a functional society is the only reason we're even nice to each other at all.

Back to the case of my brother, society has deemed it unacceptable for me to yell at the bully, and... well if we didn't have other people around the whole incident wouldn't even have happened.

This is why I like it much better living on the island in my head. I can be as selfish and evil as I want and it would not impair me IRL at all.

Highway Lanes

Just went on a family road trip to the USA. I drove 1/3 of the time. We rotated between people (my parents and I) so that no one drove for more than 2 hours. I discovered some key points about highway safety. Namely the unique identity of each lane.

Firstly the difference between a highway and a normal road is that there are no red lights or stop signs on highways. That being said cars drive faster. But you knew all that.

Highways come in 3 varieties for me, the 2-lanes, 3-lanes and 4+- lanes. I shall now attempt to use my ascii skills to explain the essentials about each lane.

2-Lane Highways


These highways are usually located in rural areas or places that don't usually get a lot of traffic.

                                                                                                                    
Right-hand lane          <-- {car}      <-- [truck]  
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Left-hand lane    <--- {car}     <---- {car}               <--- {car}
                                                                                                                    


In Right-hand lane (90-115 km/h)

• Trucks: they can't drive too fast, they run on a different speed limit and it's generally more dangerous if a giant truck crashes. Momentum and what not.
• Cars getting on and off the highway
• Cars that follow the speed limit
• Cars that're are lazy and want to just cruise by
• Cars that have a hard time accelerating 

In Left-hand lane (115+ km/h)

• Cars attempting to get to their destination faster
• Cars that are trying to overtake slower cars in right-hand lane
• Extremely reckless drivers

3-Lane Highways

These highways are usually still found in rural or less crowded areas, but generally come from or are going to a major city.

                                                                                                                 

Right-hand lane         <-- [truck]          <- {car}

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Middle lane         <-- {car}               <-- {car}          <-- [truck]

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Left-hand lane           <--- {car}                   <------ {car}

                                                                                                                 

Right-hand Lane (90-110 km/h)

• Trucks
• Cars getting on and off of highway
• Cars driving religious by the speed limit

Middle Lane (110-120 km/h)

• Cars just cruising by
• Some trucks
• Cars trying to over take slow vehicles in the right-hand lane

Left-hand Lane (120+ km/h)

• Cars trying to over take a relatively slow care in the middle lane 
• Insane speeding drivers

Often I find that the right-hand lane can turn into a faster lane because a lazy cruising driver in the middle lane's slowing people down and people are more wary of being in the left-hand lane where the insane speeders drive. In fact these categories are just a general thing, once the left-hand lane turned into the slowest lane for me. 

I'm not going to bother commenting on highways with more than 3 lanes because there, anything goes. And there's that added complexity of the High Occupancy Lane sometimes for major highways. 

All in all, I think this road trip was extremely educational.